Introducing Jie Jie

His name is Jie Jie.

He has a crazy third arm.

Jie Jie is a Chinese baby who is believed to be the first human to be born a fully developed fifth appandage. And doctors want to amputate it.

As you may expect, I consider this a bad idea. I could go on about my fascination with evolution and how this relates ... but I'll spare that for another time.

The real reason I am against this amputation is because Jie Jie could be destined for so much more. Consider the lucrative career possibilities.

• Professional Boxer - A three-armed boxer would be unstopable. Not even Evander Holyfield in his prime could defend a left-right-middle combo.


• Drummer - Def Leppard's Rick Allen gained fame as rock & roll's only one-armed drummer. If he had had three arms, who knows what "Hysteria" would have sounded like. Along the same lines, Jie Jie might want to try out the piano, as well.


• Porn Star - Ah, use your imagination here. But let's say he gets his start doing group scenes. There's lots of Jie Jie to go around.


• Spokesman - Two words: Speed Stick. Jie Jie's first deodarant commercial would be at the end of the 1st quarter during the Super Bowl. It would dominate the Monday morning water cooler talk.
  


• Running back - Did someone say, "Double stiff arm"?
  


• Actor - Jie Jie's big role would be the oddball sidekick to the serious cop. His crazy third arm would always be getting in the way, resulting in hilarious consequences.

Seriously, everyone at Blowing Smoke wishes Jie Jie the best. Our prayers are with him.

We'll just ignore the fact that God is trying to allow humans to evolve a third arm.

It's evolution, baby.